A List of Confessions

As a ResLife member, I feel the need to share some of the things most people do not expect “role model” ResLife staff members to think, do, or say.

1. At least half of us are in for the benefits: the free/discounted room, meal plan, salary pay, etc.

2. We know when you’re talking about us—the ResLife network is vast, and it includes our friends who aren’t RAs, too.

3. Along the lines of talking about others, you should know that ResLife is the best source of gossip—we know a lot of what you do, even if you think we don’t.

4. If you’ve pissed one of us off, prepare to be written up many more times, because now we want you to get in trouble. All the time.

5. We give residents nicknames that they are unaware of. “Vomit Girl” and “Awkward Boner” will stick with you for the entire year, sometimes longer.

6. We hate letting you in the building/your room when you lock yourself out. What are you going to do in the real world when this happens?

7. We are not your parents, so please don’t treat us like such. We are not here to pick up after you.

8. Remember: we’re students too. You think you’re suffering during finals? Try being on duty for 12 hours while trying to study for an organic chemistry final.

9. We’re not perfect either. So when we apologize, don’t turn it into a “look how the mighty have fallen” scenario. Do we do that to you?

10. We work hard, and we don’t get rest from our work unless we leave the residence halls, because someone will be knocking on our doors for something if we stay.

11. ResLife exists to keep you safe, but if you even hint at taking a swing at me, I am skipping the call to campus safety and calling the cops. You do manage to hit me? Prepare to have your jaw broken.

12. Don’t lie to us when we catch you breaking code or policy. It just makes the punishment that much harder on you.

13. We work really hard to decorate the building and get people active. When you disrespect that, it hurts.

Welcome

Welcome to ResLife Rant: a blog full of reslife-related rants, stories, and ideas.

This blog was started by a student who attends school X. She is a senior with a soon-to-be degree in biology and has worked in X’s ResLife dept. for 3 years.

No actual names will be used in this blog. People may be referred to as “The Boss,” “Awkward Dude,” “Beanie Girl,” etc. Some nicknames may end up being similar, because people end up being similar, too.